Starin' at the boob tube, turnin' on the big knob 
Tryin' to find some life in the waste land 
Fin'ly found a program, gonna deal with Mary Jane 
Ready for a trip into hate land 
Obnoxious Joe comes on the screen 
Along with his guest self-righteous Sam 
And one more guy who doesn't count 
His hair and clothes are too far out 

While pushin' back his glasses Sam is sayin' casually 
"I was elected by the masses" 
And with that in mind he starts to unwind 
A vicious attack on the finest of grasses 

Well it's evil, wicked, mean and nasty 
Don't step on the grass, Sam 
And it will ruin our fair country 
Don't be such an ass, Sam 
Well, it will hook your Sue and Johnny 
You're so full of bull, Sam 
All will pay that disagree with me 
Please give up you already lost the fight, alright 

Misinformation Sam and Joe 
Are feeding to the nation 
But the one who didn't count counted them out 
By exposing all their false quotations 
Faced by a very awkward situation 
This is all he'd say to save the day 

Well it's evil, wicked, mean and nasty 
Don't step on the grass, Sam 
And it will ruin our fair country 
Don't be such an ass, Sam 
Well, it will hook your Sue and Johnny 
You're so full of bull, Sam 
All will pay that disagree with me 
Please give up you already lost the fight alright 

You waste my coin Sam, all you can 
To jail my fellow man 
For smoking all the noble weed 
You need much more than him 
You've been telling lies so long 
Some believe they're true 
So they close their eyes to things 
You have no right to do 
Just as soon as you are gone 
Hope will start to climb 
Please don't stay around too long 
You're wasting precious time 

Well it's evil, wicked, mean and nasty 
Don't step on the grass, Sam 
And it will ruin our fair country 
Don't be such an ass, Sam 
Well, it will hook your Sue and Johnny 
You're so full of bull, Sam 
All will pay that disagree with me 
Please give up you already lost the fight, alright