Umm, so this is a song about Newfoundland and we wrote it about the place names and all you have to know is that all the place names in this song are real place names that we found in an atlas, 'cause we can read! 
Yeah, we can read! 
Yeah, literacy! 

Oh Newfoundland, oh Newfoundland, ya island in the sea 
I love you oh so very much, I joined the Ministry 
To show you people 'round the rock when tourist season's here 
Although in my opinion it' s a gem throughout the year 
Well if you're one for swimming, don't think it's outta reach 
You can go and take a dip along Groswater Beach 
I know the name's misleading, that's quite a problem here 
Instead let's go to Goobies and have ourselves a beer 

From Woody Point to Come-By-Chance to good ol' Ferryland 
Come take a look at Gander, Blackhead's mighty grand 
Don't let the names deceive you, Newfoundland's mighty fine 
So spend a night on Dildo if you think you've got the time 

Well you can go to Blow-Me-Down before it get's to dark (GASP) 
Oh sorry ma'am, I should have said, that's our provincial park 
There's also Whippet Harbour, or maybe Butter Pot 
Or maybe I'll just hit the pub I'm feeling like a shot 
Well you can sail on Quidi Vidi, or look at Joe Batt's Arm 
There's Placentia and there's Cow Head (MOOO!), they're so full of charm 
Get married down in Kilbride, have a party in Hate Bay 
Or have some screech in Fogo and forget about the day 

From Woody Point to Come-By-Chance to good ol' Ferryland 
Come take a look at Gander, Blackhead's mighty grand 
Don't let the names deceive you, Newfoundland's mighty fine 
So spend a night on Dildo if you think you've got the time 
Okay, the Drinkin' Verse 

From Woody Point to Come-By-Chance to good ol' Ferryland 
Come take a look at Gander, Blackhead's mighty grand 
Don't let the names deceive you, Newfoundland's mighty fine 
So spend a night on Dildo if you think you've got the time 
So spend a night on Dildo if you think you've got the time 
So spend a night on Dildo if you think you've got the time 
COD! 

Special thanks to Fiona Younger for the spelling of some placenames.