Let me tell you 'bout my alma mater 
Got educated by a rich man's daughter 
I didn't have to read a single book 
One lesson is all it took 
My diploma reads First Class Fool 
I graduated from Heartbreak School 

They don't teach science they don't teach math 
Our love is history is your only class 
You do your homework every lonely night 
Study memories till the morning light 
Forget about her is the golden rule 
That's what they teach you in heartbreak school 

You don't get recess you don't get lunch 
You don't get vacation when summer time comes 
You don't get in cause they think your smart 
You pay tuition with a broken heart

I learned to cry and I learned to moan 
I learned I hate to spend my nights alone 
I studied hard on how do I forget you (then I) 
Wrote a speech on wish I'd never met you 
I got accepted to who needs you 
I was the Valedictorian at Heartbreak school 

You don't get recess you don't get lunch 
You don't get vacation when summer time comes 
You don't get in cause they think your smart 
You pay tuition with a broken heart

So come enroll if you've been mistreated 
Get extra credit if your baby cheated 
All you need are tears and misery 
To start working toward your Ph.D 
Everybody past the age of two 
Gets educated at Heartbreak School 
You'll never find yourself a love that's true 
'Til you've graduated from Heartbreak School