Little boys and girls, they all love me 
Come sit on the lap of I-see-E 
And let me tell ya a story or two 
About a punk-ass nigga I knew 
Named Jack, he wasn't that nimble, wasn't that quick 
Jumped over the candlestick and burnt his dick 
Ran up the street cause he was piping hot 
Met a bitch named Jill on the bus stop 
Dropped a line or two, and he had the hoe 
At that type of shit he's a pro 
So Jack and Jill ran up the hill to catch a lil' nap 
Dumb bitch, gave him the claps 
Then he had to go see Dr. Bombay 
Got a shot in the ass, and he was on his way 
To make some money, why not? 
Down on Sesame Street, the dope spot 
There he saw the lady who lived in a shoe 
Sold dope out the front, but in back, marijuana grew 
For the man that was really important 
Who lived down the street in a Air Jordan 
Ride to the fellow Mister Rogers and hoes 
Drove a 500 sittin on Lorenzoes 
He broke out, Little Bo Peep, smoked out 
Saw, her and her friends sellin' sheepskins 

Yo yo I got them sheepskins 
Yo, my empty sheepskins 
Yo baby, what's up with that? 

Hickory dickory dock, it was twelve o'clock 
Cinderella ain't home must be givin up the cock 
I don't doubt it, she is kind of freaky of course 
Had a fight with Snow White, she was fuckin her dwarfs 
Saw a fight over colors, too 
Red Riding Hood, and Little Boy Blue 
A bad influence? Yo I don't know 
But Ice Cube'll tell the kids how the story should go 

Yeah money, that's it, yeah money, that's it 
This is Little Russ in the house 
Rock that shit homey, rock that shit! 
[Well, you know the rest] 

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall 
With a joint, drinkin' some 8-ball 
Three little pigs in a Coup de Ville 
Lookin' for, the wolf to kill 
They're fucked up and they want revenge 
Them and Humpty used to be friends 
Now they're enemies cause he's a traitor 
Pulled out the Uzi cruised by and sprayed him 
Cinderella hoeing for the fellas 
And Mister Rogers is gettin' mighty jealous 
Of the cash that the pigs were makin' 
Time for the pigs to get turned to bacon 
Cause Mister Rogers found out quick 
That Humpty Dumpty was blown to bits 
They said that the motherfuckin' wolf was next 
So Mister Rogers better watch his step 
So he let the wolf know 
We're gonna fuck up the pigs, and take their ho 
Cause Cinderella is much too fast 
Before twelve, givin' up ass 
Double barrels all loaded and cocked 
As soon as they show, they gonna get popped 
They bailed down Sesame Street and caught em 
Little Boy Blue is up front givin' orders 
Little did they know Cinderella was a fink 
She called the cops and got thrown in the clink 
A bad influence? Yo, I don't know 
But Ice Cube'll tell the kids how the stories should go