The offered me the office, offered me the shop. 
They said I'd better take anything they'd got. 
Do you wanna make tea at the BBC? 
Do you wanna be, do you really wanna be a cop? (No fuckin' way)

Career opportunities are the ones that never knock 
Every job they offer you is to keep you out the dock 
Career opportunity, the ones that never knock

I hate the army an' I hate the Cambridge Police. 
I don't wanna go fighting in the tropical heat 
I hate the civil service rules 
And I won't open letter bombs for you

Career opportunities are the ones that never knock...

Oi Oi Oi, Carney Givens, Arthur McGilvrey, Bobby Linchsky (I sounded out the names)

They're gonna have to introduce conscription. 
They're gonna have to take away my prescription. 
If they wanna get me making toys, If they wanna get me, well, I got no choice

Career opportunities are the ones that never knock...

Careers, Careers, Careers...... Ain't never gonna knock