She never cried when old Yeller died
She wasn't washed in the blood of the lamb
She never stood up for the star spangled banner
And she wasn't a John Wayne fan

Her baby blue eyes had the warning signs
That woman was bad to the bone
She never cried when old Yeller died
So do you think I'll cry when she's gone

So desperate, I answered an ad in the personals
Hoping to find me a date
A good lookin' non smokin' full figured Leo
Was looking to find her a mate

We hit it off, we got it on
My love was growing so strong
Then I started seeing a side of that woman
I should have seen all along

She never cried when old Yeller died
She wasn't washed in the blood of the lamb
She never stood up for the star spangled banner
And she wasn't a John Wayne fan

Her baby blue eyes had the warning signs
That woman was bad to the bone
She never cried when old Yeller died
So do you think I'll cry when she's gone

I can't believe I just didn't see
The writing there on the wall
Listening to those Barry Mannilow records
Was just one of her character flaws

Sometimes she was rude, unnaturally crude
But this good old boy let it pass
But when she cussed in front of my mom
I told she could kiss my

She never cried when old Yeller died
She wasn't washed in the blood of the lamb
She never stood up for the star spangled banner
And she wasn't a John Wayne fan

Her baby blue eyes had the warning signs
That woman was bad to the bone
She never cried when old Yeller died
So do you think I'll cry when she's gone

She never cried when old Yeller died
And I ain't gonna cry when she's gone