Just hear those noses snifflin' sore throats ticklin' 

too

Come on it's lousy weather to be sufferin' inside with 

the flu

Outside the snow is fallin' your fever's at a hundred 

and two

Let's take some Alka-Seltzer and a box of 

antihistamines too



We'll bring some Kleenex with us and sing a chorus or 

two

Let's let my red nose lead us in a sleigh ride in spite 

of the flu



Hack it up hack it up fling it up let's go phlegm 

chunks in the snow

We're coughing up a yellow and green rainbow

Cough it up cough it up cough it up oh man there's some 

on my hand



My glands are puffed and swollen and every hour I pee

My throat's as rough as leather and raspy as it can be

Let's take some Kleenex with us and sing a carol or two

We'll make our noses redder on the sleigh ride to go 

with the flu



My kid came home from preschool with a cough today

He'll infect the whole darn neighborhood in about a day

Well be calling in sick to work until the diarrhea 

stops

At the pharmacy we'll get lots more pills to pop

Pop pop pop



I took every medication I can legally buy

For coughing sneezing sniffling and the watery eyes

I'll be gettin' real drunk on NyQuil I'll take Contac 

'till I'm high

This wonderful buzz is great but I'm glad I don't have 

to drive



Just hear those noses snifflin' sore throats ticklin' 

too

Come on it's lousy weather to be sufferin' inside with 

the flu

Outside the snow is fallin' your fever's at a hundred 

and two

Come on it's lousy weather for a flu ride together with 

you